As my life dwindles away in a mindless shuffle….

So, on prompting, I answer the question-what does the Shuffle have to say about my life?  The rules are simple:

1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to each question.
4. Cheating optional

1.) Describe your first date.

“Busting Up A Starbucks” by Mike Doughty

Not precisely.  Middle school, going to the movie theater with my black girlfriend (scandalous at the time and place), to watch Backdraft and sit, only to be teased by the girl with hints of kisses, until the last 5 minutes.  Wait-maybe it’s right on the mark…

2.) What is your personal religion?

“Prayer For the Dying” – Seal

Creepy, Shuffle.   My faith, as you will, is a little freeform.  Largely, though, my faith has been shaped by a) a mom that likes to guilt me, b) long nights staring at the sky, and c) lots of death.  One way or the other, life carries on.  It’s a question of how much you understand and how gracefully you carry it.

3.) What do you think of your current hometown?

“Sour Times #1″ – Portishead

Hrm.  I like Raleigh, but like so many of my other compadres, I never saw myself staying here as long as I have.   Perhaps I could have been more successful elsewhere.

4.) What do you feel guilty about?

“Stupefy”-Disturbed

This is my chief guilt.  Never smart enough, never fast enough.  If I had been a little more perceptive, a little more aware, a little bolder….

When you’re surrounded by highly intelligent people, you become painfully aware of the things you haven’t thought about, and how life could be different.

5.) What embarrasses you?

“Shotgun Blues”-The Blues Brothers

In short, how long I hang on to anything, whether it be old dreams or my love of John Belushi movies.  Actually, fuck that-Belushi rocks.  So, just that doggish nature of mine.  That, and being a whiner.

6.) What kind of restaurant would you open?

“God Is In The House” -Nick Cave

Soul food?  Let’s do it!

7.) How do you feel about fall?

“All I Want” Toad and the Wet Sprocket

I constantly bitch about the weather here.  Fall seems to be the neutral ground, where you can fall asleep in a cool breeze and have a nice enough chill to sleep well at night.  Add that to colorful trees (admit it, peeps, we’ve got it better than most places) and you’re set.

8.) What’s your greatest fear?

“Can’t Turn You Loose”-The Blues Brothers

Wow.  Let’s hope I can grow up!

9.) What’s your biggest weakness?

“No Rain” Blind Melon

I have no idea what this means.  But I think we’re all up to date on my weaknesses.  Next, please.

10.) What was the last lie you told?

“If You Leave”-Orchestrated Maneuvers in the Dark

…..I’ll call you.

11.) What’s the biggest thing you learned in school?

“Hell’s Bells”-AC/DC

It’s the nightmare you can never escape.  Do you hear them ringing?

I actually enjoyed school, although I didn’t appreciate what I was learning then.  I would enjoy school if I went back.  But the fact is, we’re never leaving school. Ever.

12.) What did you dream your life would be like as a child?

“Basket Case”-Green Day

I think this makes sense.  I was an inordinately quiet child, who spent most of his time playing with toys or watching the people around him.  If my family is any indicator of how life is supposed to be, then this is the song for it.  That, and I thought it would be a lot more exciting.

13.) What was your first serious girlfriend/boyfriend like?

“I Love You Mary Jane”-Cypress Hill

I have no idea how this fits, either.  Other than she got weirder as she got older.

14.) What were you doing 10 years ago?

“Dissolved Girl”-Massive Attack

So, I think Mr. Shuffle got confused.  So, to rotate 13 and 14, the girl: a) Girl used to joke about the Bugle Boy Jeans I wore-the initials on the jeans were her initials.  She liked the idea of me being branded.  Can I pick em or what? b) she saw me mainly to piss off her grandad, a huge racist.   10 years ago:  That song is off the Judgement Night Soundtrack, which I listened to constantly around that time.  Driving everywhere with it blasting, either pimping out for no one in particular, or headbanging.  Wow.

15.) What will you be doing in 10 years?

“The Music Lovers”-Destroyer

“The times of your life have been had…” Perhaps looking back on this as the best days.  Depression sets in.

16.) What does a cry for help from you sound like?
Apparently like 15!

“Soul Man”-The Blues Brothers

Getting too gregarious?  That fake smile that I’m told shines way too much?  Or perhaps my future cocaine problem?

17.) What do you buy at Wal-Mart?

“Overkill”-Men At Work

HA!

18.) Describe your personal political philosophy

“Jump”-Van Halen

Got my back against the racking machine-what the hell does that mean, anyway?  I think the spirit of the song is the best fit-tough, but hopeful.   And not on any party line (although I think waaay out on the left is pretty good)

19.) Do You like to travel?

“Mass Romantic”-The New Pornographers

I do, although I haven’t done enough of it.  I formerly imagined myself doing it with a partner.  Now, I imagine it as a year long hike.

20.) How do you feel about your coworkers?

“Somebody To Love”-Queen

I get stiff voices from my coworkers sometimes, so I wonder if I’ve done something to tick them off-like not work.  Couldn’t be that…..

So that’s the list for me.  Mr. Shuffle isn’t quite an 8 ball, but close enough.  Enjoy!  Oh, and if you haven’t checked out Pandora, please do so, track me down, and share a station with me!